Barenaked Ladies

One Week - Barenaked Ladies

Its been one week since you looked at me
Cocked your head to the side and said Im angry.
Five days since you laughed at me
Saying get that together come back and see me.
Three days since the living room
I realized its all my fault, but couldnt tell you
Yesterday youd forgiven me
But itll still be two days till I say Im sorry

Its been one week since you looked at me
Threw your arms in the air and said youre crazy
Five days since you tackled me
Ive still got the rug burns on both my knees
Its been three days since the afternoon
You realized its not my fault not a moment too soon
Yesterday youd forgiven me
And now I sit back and wait till you say youre sorry

Its been one week since you looked at me
Dropped your arms to your sides and said Im sorry
Five days since I laughed at you
And said you just did just what I thought you were gonna do
Three days since the living room
We realized were both to blame, but what could we do?
Yesterday you just smiled at me
Cause itll still be two days till we say were sorry
Itll still be two days till we say were sorry
Itll still be two days till we say were sorry

I love this song, and have done ever since it was the theme for the Digimon Movie... yes, i am somewhat emotionally stunted. It's catchy, sure, but i also like the lyrics. They seem quite relevant to life and the way that myself and the people around me do things. So it's still on my 'top songs' playlist, even after eight years.

Unfortunately, this song chose tonight to pop into my head. Add lyrics that strike a chord in me to the fact that this week makes a year since some pretty important stuff happened to me and i'm working hard to ignore it. Even more unfortunately, this week has all the same events as this week last year (funny that), so i can't escape all the memories that i've spent weeks trying to burn from my mind.

So. Now, instead of studying, i'm doing all that i can to ignore the fact that i was ecstatic at this time last year and could barely keep a smile from my face. I'm trying to forget that the smile was wiped from my face before i could get used to it. I'm shaking a little, because i don't want to fall to pieces. I'm wanting to drown my sorrows, but that involves locations that i frequented last year and am therefore terrified to go near. I'm pretending that the events over the last year haven't left me somewhat shattered on the inside and unable to trust people. I'm lying to myself and thinking that i'll get that huge, goofy grin back eventually. And i'm busting to convince myself that i'm over it all and don't care anymore.

I'm fairly certain that my need to write this post, just so i could express what i can't say aloud, indicates that i do still care.