Down In The Dumps

Pick Me Ups

Calling: Anyone who can put a smile on my face for more than a minute at a time. Reward? How about some major friend-points? That's about all i've got at the moment. But hey, put me in a good mood and i can be pretty great company - so maybe that would ne enough of a reward.

I hate change. It's usually not for the better. So that's good enough reason for me to dislike it immensley. I try to avoid it at all costs. Change, by definition, includes the removal of anything that makes you happy or comfortable. Even losing the things that usually make you miserable. When they're consistent, at least they don't sneak up on you. Definately better that way!

Changes of the week? Multiple. As of yet, i'm undecided whether or not they're good or bad changes. I'll let you know.

Music team's under new management. Rev.J asked me to lead one week but i'm not sure. For one, i don't know if i could do it. Or if i'm confident enough to. For two, i've got a niggling feeling that Dr.B may be behind the offer, seeing as he's slowly realising that i've got serious insecurity issues about my place at church. So i'm not quite sure what to do about that.

There's a slim possibility that i may be able to hit europe and india at the end of the year - even though most of the guys bailed on me, Pi mite yet come through; even if it means that we'll be pit stopping in spain every few days. Seeing as i'm desparate to leave the country and even more desparate to see india again... fingers crossed!

I'm a working woman now. I babysit thursday afternoons, trying to keep a very enthusiastic eight year old occupied until i take her to dancing. I work at church all friday, usually from 9am until 10pm, so that's a long day. Saturday mornings i teach swimming for three hous, trying not to drown 25 little munchkins and coming out all chlorine-y. This weekend i've got a conference all day friday and saturday, fun times. Sunday mornings i sometimes have to take sunday school, trying to impart words of wisdom on eleven year olds. On the one hand, i get the cash. On the other, what little free time i have is no longer mine. So, no more sleep for me. But it's not so bad. I actually like some of it.

I scored a bass guitar! Totally mine for at least nine months. Hooray! ...Still got to learn how to play, but hey, that's always do-able.

I had to say good-bye to a good friend today. Which totally sucks. I'm not really so good with the farewells. All i really wanted to say was how much i'd miss him, but all i managed was to wish him good luck and hold back the tears. I know that makes guys uncomfortable, so at least i succeeded on that point. Anyway, now i'm a little down. Missing a friend will do that to you.

This time last year, if i had a desparate need for chick flicks, chocolate, comfort, whatever, then i'd just need to call one of the girls. Nowadays? People are pretty busy. You tend to just get the 'it'll be ok' line that i hate so much. False comforts don't really beat out good old fashioned girl time.

I used to laugh hysterically all the time. You'd never see me sad and cranky, or if you did all you'd have to do was crack a joke and the common room would be filled with people laughing left, right and centre - me included. Now? I can actually count the times i've laughed uncontrollably in the last three months on the one hand. Awful. Now, it's at the extent that someone said to me the other day 'i've never seen you laugh like that before'. It was a pretty huge shock to realise that such a big part of what made me 'me' wasn't there anymore.

I've switched from watching Friends 24/7 to alternating between Grey's Anatomy, One Tree Hill, Ally McBeal and Beverly Hills. I'm liking the variety. And loving the soundtracks on Grey's and Tree Hill. Good stuff. You should check it out if you haven't already.

I'm a P2-er now. No more P-Plates for me! I feel much more grown-up on the roads. Even though there's really no change. I think people in other cars look at you differently too, when you don't have P-Plates on display. Do you think that's true? Or is it just me?

I have a new favourite pair of shoes. My comfy brown boots. I loooooove them. Best shoes in the whole wide world. I think i've worn them everyday in the last week. Best part? I stole them off my mum, so they didn't even cost me anything.

So, there are lots of changes happening at the moment. Seeing as i dislike them so much, it's no wonder i'm in need of a pick-me-up. But who knows? Maybe some of them will end up as being good ones. Or not. Only time will tell...

Annie