My Mind Is A Soup

Unfortunately, I'm Not Hungry

At the moment, all guys in the entire world can be classified and swept into one of four groups; 'icky', 'friend-worth', 'do-able' or 'drool-worthy'. No, i didn't come up with those groups, so you can stop laughing. Anway, at birth people are supposed to come with an inbuilt ability to be able to classify people into these groups. It keeps things simple. You steer clear of the 'icky' dudes, buddy up with those who are 'friend-worthy', spend plenty of time at parties keeping an eye out for the 'do-able' guys and.. well, i suppose the guys who are 'drool-worthy' incite actions that are fairly obvious.

However, problems arise when this inbuilt ability is missing. Then all you're left with is four categories, a few billion guys and a mind that is so full of muddle that is is much like a chicken noodle soup - you know, the type with all the little bits of corn and peas? Not so pleasant.

It has recently been discovered that i am missing this ability. I can't even distinguish (for the most part) who the 'icky' people are. When it comes to separating 'friends', 'do-ables' and 'drool-worthys', i'm a lost cause. Which, as i'm sure you can imagine, leads to much annoyance and distress. Try meeting a nice guy and being unable to decide whether you like him as a friend, as someone you could randomly hook-up with or someone who you could worship for a month or so. It's very annoying. VERY ANNOYING. Especially when you remember that it really isn't up to you anyway, the ultimate decision rests with them :P But that's not the point... although i don't really know what is!

I'm hoping it's all just part of that phase (do you know the one i mean? If not, there's obviously a reason i haven't told you, so you can just imagine something here). If it's just a phase that means it'll eventually end and all i have to do it ride it out. If it's not a phase... well, we'll deal with that when the time comes.

To sum up? Don't ask me who's on my list at the moment. By all means, feel free to share yours. But when asked, my soupish mind re-surfaces and i'm left with handful or two of names and no idea where to put them. I'm not trying to keep secrets, i just literally can't tell you because i don't know myself! That said, keep an eye on me - i don't want to find that i've mistakenly thought that i've found a way through the soup, only to find that i've merely hit the side of the bowl.

I don't think i'll ever want to eat soup again.