Craaaaaap....

Ok, so i realise that i've spent far more money than i usually would in the last few weeks. At first, i had my little shopping spree when i got my tax return. Spent lots of money. But i had some to spare, so all was well. Over the next week, i fell into a very dangerous trap. The trap of believing that you have more money than you actually do. This belief means that i've been walking into shops and saying 'well, i wouldn't normally, but i have some money to spare, so i suppose i can splurge...'. Unfortunately, i just checked my bank balance. It has become apparent that i most definitely could not afford to splurge in the degree that i did. A large chunk of my savings (meagre as they were and only just reaching a point that i deemed acceptable) is gone. I'm rather devestated. I like to have a nice buffer in my savings account that is no longer available. Granted, i'll get paid at work and get some monet from the rentals in the next month... but that period in between where i have very little in my account makes me very uneasy. I suspect it has something to do with my lovely obesessive compulsive tendencies that make me desperate to have things in otder. Gah, this is going to drive me insane and leave me very ill at ease. Bring on the next paycheck.

To add stress to stress, i had about four hours of meetings today, which led to my biting my fingernails. Their situation isn't dire, but they're quite a lot shorter than they were earlier. Which is distressing, because they were so lovely and long! I saw it coming, of course, but was hoping i could stave it off... apparently not. Grr for short nails. I'll have to paint them again and go back to square one in the growing process.

My OCD is not at all at ease this week. GAH! Huge amounts of frustration. HUGE.